So there is this woman I am sort of friends with who has a handicapped child, and her son really needs a wheelchair. This child is still in single digits in age, but what they need isn't just any ordinary wheelchair, but one that is specially-built for children.
While there are cheaper options available, the one they really want and should get would cost $700 USD. This is one of those specialized "strollers" that are built to high quality standards, and will allow a child to "grow" into them, and continue to use it as they get bigger, up until they can use adult wheelchairs.
Cheaper options are not only less durable, they are also a bit more hazardous (doesn't support the head for example, or maybe they are more likely to fall out of it), but it also doesn't really allow a child to grow into them, meaning they would have to replace it with something else as the child gets bigger, again and again.
Unfortunately, this woman can't afford the expensive one. She was just telling me that in passing, without knowing anything about me or my financial situation, and after hearing about it, I asked her if I could just get it for her.
I've donated to charity before, and until now, I have never encountered any friction or resistance about it. The other person agrees. I pay, they say thank you. Done and done. Life moves on.
So, imagine my surprise when this woman actually refused, saying she had to think about it. And not only that, but she thought about it for TWO FULL WEEKS before finally agreeing to it (without me forcing her or anything by the way).
Looking back at it, I think I understand though. She has to be careful with people just offering money out of nowhere, right? Who is this guy? Why is he offering? What's the catch? What does he really want in return? Right?
From my perspective though, it's just one of those things in life where I know this is the best choice to make, and the only obstacle here is the cost. If so, then yeah I'll pick up this tab, why not? I'm a simple guy, and that's all there is to it.
It's just an interesting experience because I've never had anyone refuse before. Well, at least initially anyway. She did eventually agree.
August 7th, 2025 at 09:11 pm 1754597475
Years ago I went to take a check to the local large food pantry so they could buy food since they could get more bang for the buck as far as non perishables. I was told I had to wait on the director so I sat down to do that. There was an elderly couple waiting as well. She had brought two very neatly folded grocery bags that were cloth. Her husband had a WWII ball cap on. She wouldn't meet anyone's eyes. I thought they were probably in their late 80s and felt shame that they had to supplement their groceries with visiting this food pantry. The husband had that far away look of someone that people with dementia, so I would imagine she had her hands full. I didn't stare at her, but my heart went out to her. The food pantry's purpose was just for people like them who needed that extra to get by and there was no shame, but I could tell she was ashamed. The beauty of this particular food pantry is it is set up very much like a store and people are encouraged to take things they want. There are limits, of course, but they have all kinds of things so it's just more than peanut butter and boxed mac and cheese.
August 8th, 2025 at 03:50 am 1754621407
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August 8th, 2025 at 05:51 pm 1754671882
LifeBalance: I prefer this as well. I’ve donated to large charity organizations before, such as UNICEF and United Way. The thing I don’t like about them is that, as you say, there is overhead, and you don’t really know where the money is actually going to. Also, once you donate, they will keep spamming your mailbox with junk mail pleading for more money. Frankly, I just don’t like my mailbox to be filled with junk mail of any kind. Like seriously guys, I know how to get in touch with you. Please don’t spam me anymore.
I view charity as a form of investing as well, only instead of investing into myself, I am investing into others. In both cases though, it is possible to make both good investments and bad investments, and I do like individual cases like these because due diligence is a lot easier here. That and I’m not filthy rich or anything, so I can only donate so much at any given time. Ultimately, I try to donate where I think my money will do the most good.
August 8th, 2025 at 10:10 pm 1754687451
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August 9th, 2025 at 02:13 am 1754702007