Trying to keep Tabs on my finances

Remember Red Box?  Those vending machines you see in grocery stores and side of gas stations that let you rent movies and games for cheap?  Apparently, they were bought out by another company a while back, and that new company has declared bankruptcy.

Oh but there's more!  Due to the bankruptcy, these Red Box kiosks are largely abandoned now, leaving it wide open for some people to break open and plunder its contents.  Wild.

Anyway, a moment of silence for an affordable entertainment I used to enjoy.

It's that time of the year!  That time where the weather is cool enough that I am finally digging out my winter clothes.  I used to do this usually around September, sometimes as early as August, but now?  I guess this year's "time of the year" is in November!

They still got food stains that can't seem to ever wash out no matter what I do, and holes I never got around to patching.  Still though, they are so comfy, I am reluctant to get rid of them, especially the pants!

I'll have to replace some day, but that day is not today!  Too comfy!

So remember how I said my accounts were compromised by that data leak by National Public Data breach?  Since then, I've closed a bunch of my credit cards that I wasn't using, and also signed up with Experian to help monitor my credit score.

Long story short, I got an alert not long ago saying I've got some kind of weird credit charge or whatever, on one of those presumably closed accounts.  I'm thinking to myself, "Hmm, am I misreading this?  How is this possible?"  I double checked online, and some websites are saying this could be due to a credit pull or something.  But if so, why does it show a balance, and that it's decreasing?  Anybody know?

Speaking of frights, anybody have a nice Halloween?  I accidentally slept through mine haha.  Guess I am getting old and tire more easily or something.

I was talking to a friend earlier today about our past relationships, and the topic came up as to why I broke it off with the last woman I dated.  In a word?  Money.  It may not be politically-correct to say that out loud, but when it's all said and done, that's basically what it came down to.

Around 2022 to 2023, I met this lovely woman who is also a single mother.  This isn't new to me, as my ex-wife was also a single mother when I first met her, and to this day, I treat my adopted kid no different than my biological kids (but they are also all adults now).

Knowing what I went through the first time, both emotionally and financially, I knew that it would not be an easy road.  Still, I understood what I was signing up for, and I was fine with it so long as I had a decent, like-minded partner working beside me.  Unfortunately, I found out that I did not.  Put plainly, she turned out to be a spender while I was a saver.

Before I continue with this story, I do confess that I'm not exactly the most frugal person out there.  I still spend money when I really shouldn't on stuff I don't actually need.  However, while I may not be the best saver out there, I am still a saver at heart.  If I learned anything with my marriage many moons ago, it is that financial compatibility is just as important as emotional compatibility.

For us guys, trying to figure out women is like trying to learn alien hieroglypics.  Even when narrowed down to just financial compatibility, it is not always easy and obvious.  There were a lot of small, possible red flags along the way, but the straw that broke the camel's back was when she hinted that she wanted me to buy her a brand new iPhone.  I thought she was joking at first, and I laughed and played along, but then, I got the hint that while she was "joking" about it, she was actually not joking.

Now, would I actually buy her a brand new iPhone?  I wouldn't say it's completely out of the question, but you understand my concerns right?  Why no Androids?  Why must it be an iPhone specifically?  And why does it have to be the latest model of iPhone?  Not only that, but why won't she spend HER own money to get one?  Why am I the one who has to buy one with MY money?  I did ask these questions, and basically, her response was, "But don't you love me?  Aren't I worth it?" Faaaantastic.

At this point, I also want to point out that she has no idea what my net worth is.  She just knows I don't mind paying for things when we go out.  Still though, a plate of pasta and a glass of wine is one thing, but brand-new hotel stays and iPhones is just a bridge too far for me.

I'm really shortening this story, and simplifying it for clarification purposes, but after spending a good week meditating on this clear-as-mud situation, I ultimately ruled that this isn't going to work out.  It took more than a decade of me struggling to regain my footing after my disastrous marriage, to finally feel so immensely grateful and free to get a second chance at life, from what I thought was going to be a lifetime sentence of utter ruin and hopelessness.

She had wonderful kids too.  I am sorry for her and her kids especially.  I truly am, but I can't afford to fall back into the abyss again.  I need someone who is a saver, or else, I would much rather stay single for the rest of my life.

So, I guess as a part of getting older, I really shouldn't be surprised about having to take medication on a regular basis.  I've mentioned this before, but the short recap is that I am Type 2 diabetic, and am having to take two kinds of medicine for it.  All this happened earlier this year.  Before, it was just one medicine, and it was easier to track.

But with two, somehow I now feel like I'm constantly watching the clock or something, and on some days, I am actually forgetting whether I already took which medicine yet or not.  Needless to say, I need to get much better organized.

Hence, the reason for this post: For those who take medication, how do you track your pills?

I recently bought one of those month-long pill cases, so I can track my daily medication intake.  I know this is a financial site, and it's not ideal to solve your problems by spending money into it, BUT if this somehow manages to fix my pill tracking issues, I would say it is completely worth the money.  I just got it a couple of days ago, and am hoping this works out.

And while typing this out, I just realized I also forgot my second blood sugar check.

Ok, I admit the title is rather ostentatious, but after many, many... many years, I think I have finally got this crock pot thing down.  I put the nom noms in.  I turn on the power.  I say prayers to our lord and savior Gordan Ramsey.  And after many hours of impatient waiting, somehow at the end of all, food!

While crock pots can last a lifetime, unfortunately, my previous one had finally developed a crack in it, and I decided it was time to move on.  This was roughly six months ago.

Ladies and Gentlemen, feast your eyes on my latest and greatest in crock pot hotness: The Ninja Foodi Everyday Possible Cooker Pro!  (Seriously, how many drops of acid did marketing take while watching anime before they came up with that name?)

This is the smaller 6.5 quart pot sibling to the more popular and more expensive 8 quart brother that people rave about.  Now, I know I could have purchased another crock pot for even cheaper than this, but there were a couple of reasons why I decided to go with this.

First and foremost is the fact that steel will not fracture like the ceramic bowls of a crockpot.  Also, it's advertised as an 8-in-1 cooker, with other functions that, if I am being perfectly honest, I haven't tried yet, but do intend to some day... just as soon as I figure out how.

With the weather cooling down as low as the mid 40F this week (at night), I decided to fire up the new crock pot again.  This time, I have chuck roast with cabbage, mushroom, onions simmering away.

I am sure everyone has heard of the devastation hurricane Helene has caused.  One such place is Asheville, NC, which I have been to several time before.  I saw the videos in horror of the eateries and businesses that I fondly remember visiting when I was there.  The level of damage is just insane.

I was affected by the hurricane as well, though nowhere near anything like that.  I think I lost power for like about 90 minutes, and that's it.

While I don't consider myself a prepper, I do like some of the philosophies and ideas they come up with.  I just dial it down to a much smaller scale, based on whatever realistic problems that I believe I may face.  For example, the longest power outage I have suffered living where I am is 3 days.  As such, I tend to have a week's worth of stockpile on hand at any given time.  If I expect trouble in advance, like with hurricane Helene, I may double that.

Preppers have a saying regarding stockpiles, "Food, Water, Power, Fuel, and Ammo".  Food, isn't too difficult, as it mostly consists of bulk buys of canned goods for me.

Water, however, is trickier.  They are relatively heavy and bulky, and are also a higher priority than food.  However, I find that typically a gallon worth of drinking water a day is enough for me to get by.   So, for just little old me, it's still not an insurmountable task.

Power isn't difficult either, once I got myself a quality power bank that can easily charge my cellphone for up to a week and more.

Ammo is controversial as it depends on each individual's personal philosophy on such things, as well as whether it is even legal to own firearms to begin with, based on where you live.  Suffice to say though, I stockpiled more than enough for my needs many years ago.  In other words, the cost is $0 as I don't plan on buying any more anytime soon.

I personally don't worry about alternate currencies like gold coins or gold bars because, realistically, whatever businesses remain functioning will still accept cash and even credit cards if their reader is still working.  If all else fails, literally the rest of the supplies can be used as barter.  In fact, they're actually more useful in barter than gold, since you can't eat, drink, shoot, or charge your phone with gold.

If I am being completely honest, I was slightly disappointed that my area wasn't hit harder by the hurricane, especially after all the extra preparation I made for it.  Of course, I still much prefer this than what happened to Asheville.

Also, I have to balance all this with being financially responsible.  It is extremely easy to go overboard, and I know people online who do just that.  I myself try to keep my costs at a minimum.

Finally, my view on um prepping is to remain flexible and open to suggestions.  It is likely to evolve some more as time goes by, especially if I find more affordable options out there.  For example, I know there are bulk dried foods and MREs that I have yet to try.  Experimenting with them does open myself up to additional upfront costs, so I haven't gotten around to any of that just yet.

I was not born in America, but have lived here for nearly all of my life.  I have always figured I would travel back to my native country some day, you know, just to visit my birth place, and see if I should even expat there some day due to the much lower cost of living.

Unsurprisingly, between work, marriage, divorce, kids, and the overall cost of traveling internationally, I just never really gotten around to it.

However, because I currently can't legally drive, and am between jobs, it kind of opened up a rare window of opportunity to actually travel.  This is the first time I was able to do so in 30 years, and chances are good, it would also be my last.

Needless to say, I took lots of photos.  Shocking even myself, more than 5000 of them if you can believe that!  But you know, it's better to take too many than too little I think, and don't worry, I'm not going to post all of them haha.  That would be so insane.

Bonus question: Is it my imagination, or is the SA blogs really slow?  If so, has it been like this for a while, or is this something new?  And what's causing it?

I’ve been debating if I even want to share this.  It’s kind of annoying and kind of embarrassing.  However, with ample spare time right now, I guess it has put me more in the mood to gripe about my life.  It’s also kind of a long story, but I will do my best to try to keep it short.

This tragic tale of misadventure started all the way back in early 2020, when I got into a car accident.  At the time, I was working out, taking a quick nap, then working out some more at a martial arts school, then quick shower and meal, then rushing into work.

Now, I am not a fitness buff.  My cave brain just somehow thought I could replicate the same type of workout schedule that I followed when I was in my 20’s.  It also did not help that my work was short-staffed, and as an essential employee who often had to stay over, especially after Covid shutdown, I was often times staying over for 12 hours or more.  What all this added up to was a very tired guy who dozed off quite a bit as he drove home.

Now, like any other smooth-brained men out there, I was also no stranger to driving home tired.  So, it did not occur to me that this was a problem at the time.  All I had to do was to get home in one piece, take a quick shower, and I can head right to bed.  At least, I thought that until one day, I accidentally dozed off one too many times and ended up slamming into a neighbor’s parked car.

The good news is nobody was hurt except for bumping my head I guess.  In fact, I was the only one there at the accident.  While the vehicle wasn’t totaled either, the insurance company decided to write it off completely, because I was driving a Prius at the time.  It turns out that hybrid engines are actually quite expensive to repair and require specialists.  And with the looming Covid shutdown, they decided the easiest thing to do was just write both vehicles off.  Ok.

That same year, DMV caught wind of it, and decided that I needed to submit a full medical report to make sure I wasn’t on drugs or was intoxicated.  They must have read the report stating that both vehicles were totaled, so it must have been severe.  Hence the likely over-reaction.  No problem though.  Except for caffeine, I don’t drink, I don’t smoke, I don’t do anything interesting as far as I know.  For heaven sake, I drove a Prius.

Unfortunately, while the medical check-up came up empty on those fronts, it did also reveal that I went from pre-diabetic to full-blown type 2 diabetic.  While this was news to me, DMV decided that that must be the cause of the car accident, and from then on, it turned into an entire rigamarole where I had to constantly submit medical reports to make sure I was still somehow fit to drive.

A quick tangent if you will.  Apparently diabetes come in two forms, hypoglycemic and hyperglycemic.  The former is the one that would cause one to faint behind the wheel, with the blood sugar being too low.  However, I am and have always been the latter. It’s still not a good thing, but the point here is, sheer male stupidity aside, my form of diabetes would not cause me to faint behind the wheel.

Fast forward some more to 2023, it all went well for a while, and I even had my diabetes under control.  Unfortunately, when both of my medication and medical check-ups lapsed when I changed insurance and doctors, that’s when my real nightmare with doctors and the DMV started to really flare up.  I had to find a new doctor that would take my new insurance, which would then take months to set up an appointment.  My diabetes also went out of control during this time.  So, this new doctor told me to set up appointments with four other new doctors for a full medical checkup, and each of them required separate appoints that also took months to setup.  It was insane!

Through this ordeal, my driver's license had finally lapsed, and I was no longer able to legally drive.  However, I did finally find a doctor that understood the difference between hypoglycemic and hyperglycemic, and that it would not cause me to faint while driving.  In fact, he was the one who voluntarily told me that, without me asking about it, and gladly signed me off to be able to drive again.

Alas, the DMV remains unconvinced.  They sent back a reply stating they want that doctor and I to participate in some kind of “hearing” whatever that means, to prove my fitness to drive.  After filling out said hearing request, the DMV has been silent for nearly a month now, with no hint whatsoever as to when or even IF they will ever get back to me, and if so, in what ways.

Until then, I am mostly stuck at home.  While I am a bit of a homebody to begin with, the walls can still feel like it will close in on me sometimes, in what feels like another round of personal Covid lockdown. Now that the weather is starting to cool, I will try to go out and jog or something, but other than that, it’s just an uncomfortable feeling being stuck at home the whole time.

So that's where I am right now, and why I suddenly have so much time on my hands.  However, I would like to end this on a more upbeat note, and it would be the fact that, because I have been SOMEWHAT financially responsible, I do kind of have enough passive income to float on by without having to actively work due to my current inability to drive.

I’ve often fantasized about retiring early.  I just never thought I would be forced into trying it out right now through this mandatory staycation.

Stumbled across this tweet.  The scary part is I don't think this is uncommon.  In fact, I think the vast majority of Americans are in the same boat.

When I thought about what her options are, I immediately thought, "She needs to find a rich, gullible man."  which as a guy, I hate having thought that.  Most men don't have that kind of luxury and have to work for our own money.  To be fair, I imagine most women would prefer having their own money as well.

In desperate times though, and with limited options, what do you think?  Should she try to find and marry a rich, gullible guy?

My dad ran into a scam on his computer, where it showed an ad that said his computer has been infected by malware, and to immediately contact Windows tech support to get it removed.  The ad was even blaring a loud alarm audio, and included a phone number to call for said "tech support".

My parents are not exactly computer-savvy, so they immediately called me to come take a look at it, and I told them that it was a scam, and showed them how to restore the computer.

The scary part is, my dad actually called the phone number.  Luckily, he was confused and hung up before he handed over any bank or credit card information, and instead opted for me to arrive and fix it for him.

In April earlier this year, there was a massive data breach with some criminal background data base company, and nearly 3 BILLION records, including social security numbers were leaked over the darknet.  If you are American, chances are good you might have already been compromised.

Quick and dirty solution: Keep a hawk eye on your credit history.  Ask the credit scoring companies to "freeze" your account to prevent anyone, including yourself, from opening any new loans or credit cards.  Lock or freeze any credit cards that you don't use.

But yeah, please be careful out there.  My dad dodged a bullet.

Ok, I just want to gripe real quick about the membership wholesale warehouse retail box store place thingie that is BJ's.

Whenever I go there, which isn't frequent, but when I do, it always shows at the check-out that my membership expires on the end of September.

However, the linked membership card / credit card shows that the annual renewal fee is at the beginning of September.

Wait, let me make sure I have this straight: The membership renewal portion is due on the end of September.   The annual fee portion for the credit card is due on the beginning of September.  I think.

The whole thing is just confusing enough that I even had to re-type some of the sentences above.  And that's what I find annoying here.  I just don't go to BJ's enough to have to worry about all this.  I'm going to cancel soon, even though it costed me $55 in renewal fee... but is that for the credit card, the warehouse membership, or both???

I haven't been around due to personal life reasons... well, if I am being completely honest, it's mostly because I am lazy haha.  However, SavingAdvice has always been my online financial home if you will, and now that my personal life has changed some more, I seem to have a bit more free time to "come home" more often so to speak.  I hope everyone who is still here is doing well.

Also, I'd like to pick the community's mind with a question: I have a friend who is going through divorce right now, and his ex-wife is fighting him every step of the way.  To defend himself, he has already paid more than $20k USD in legal fees, using bank and personal loans.  Not only that, but he owes them an additional $5k more, and he doesn't know where to raise that money from!  Is this how much divorce lawyers cost these days?  It's utterly insane!

In a desperate move, he has hit up anyone he knows, including me, explaining his predicament and wondering if there is anyone who can help him financially.  He is a good man, but like most people I know around me, financial savvy is not one of their personal strengths....

Now, in real life, nobody knows that I am a millionaire.  Actually, I'm not even sure if my parents know.  If I am being completely honest, I am scared to tell anyone.  I've struggled for so long, saving and investing, just to make it to this point.  Also, it's like a Pandora's box, you know?  Once it's open, you can't close that thing again.  Besides, it's not like being barely a millionaire counts for all that much these days.

Still, technically, I COULD help my friend here, BUT I also have a hard and fast rule, which is that I never donate or gift money to anyone who solicits me.  To be clear, I DO donate to charity, but ONLY anonymously, and ONLY to people who is not soliciting me.  Last time was earlier this year, where I donated to someone who has advanced stage pancreatic cancer, but she still has young kids to raise.  They don't know who I am, and they never will.

Plus, $5k would still be a massive dent to my emergency fund, AND there is no telling how much more his lawyers would charge up if they think my friend can somehow raise even more money.

My question though, is should I give him any money at all, and if so, how much?  Am I being a jerk here for not helping him more?  I've helped pay for little things here and there, but nothing really substantial so far.  What do you think?

In a move that surprises even myself, I am on... day 4 (?) of basically eating out of my crockpot.  It all started out when I had a craving for some crockpot soup.  Some days, I just crave some good slow cooked mushrooms (when on sale), onions, and savoy cabbage in french onion soup.  I don't know why I love Savoy cabbage but not the regular, cheaper kind of cabbage, but it's so worth the extra cost to me.

Anyway, I had leftovers for the next day, so I got some chicken thighs and heated that up some more.  Then day 3 and then day 4, got more mushrooms, onions, and savoy cabbage along the way.  Wow, I don't think I've ever just eaten basically the same soup for this long.  I just kept buying some ingredients I feel like dropping in and heating it up along with the leftovers.

I have to say, I also feel a bit smug.  You see, I managed to burn my soup from last week that I cooked in a regular pot.  Who knew that you can burn soup if you leave the heat on max?  Oh, you did?  Uh, news to me.  Had to use a metal scrubber just to get the burnt, crusted stains out.

Luckily, a crockpot is so idiot proof even this idiot can use it without burning the place down.

Oh yeah, and I am also saving money this way as well.  My food cost has gotten so ridiculous over this inflation, I need to get it down more.